Off to the Windy City.....

I am just getting ready to head out to Chicago for a Pampered Chef convention and realized I needed to make a post this week. I think the best way to sum up my life for the past week or so is something like this, listen to Aspen cry, catch up on my laundry and cleaning, listen to Aspen cry, go to Salt Lake and visit with my fam, listen to Aspen cry the whole time I was there, take the boat out on the lake and not get up skiing again (its been 3 years since I have tried), listen to Apsen cry the whole time on the boat, spend hours working on getting ready for girls camp, listen to Aspen cry. In case you haven't noticed my little monster in sheeps clothing CRIES ALOT! I honeslty think that if I didn't have Pampered Chef one night a week to make me leave I might be writting you from the looney bin right now.

Wish my amazing husband luck with the kidlits. He is always so supportive of me attending these conventions. I promise I make more money with Pampered Chef because I go. (and I keep my sanity for 3 more days) So with 30 bags of breast milk in the freezer and trusty breast pump in tow off I go!

Update for the Past Week

So its been a fun few days around our house. We started off our 4th of July like every year and headed to the Huntsville Park for breakfast and then a parade. Several years ago Justin and I decided that we wanted to start a tradition with our kids of going to breakfast and watching our small town parade and hanging out all day until fireworks in the park that evening. I am so glad we did. After we left the park that morning Hunter looks at us and says "this is the best day of my life!"

We were lucky to have my brother James and sister-in-law Bethany staying with us that weekend. James just found today that he has been comissioned into the Army and leaves for basic training in Ft. Knox on September 22nd then to Ft. Benning, Georgia in December for Officer Candidate School. After that we are not sure where he will end up but he is so excited and we are excited for him.

The night of the 4th we took our boat out on Pineview with Justin's family and watched fireworks from the boat. It was so fun!

Today Jen and her kids stopped and picked up my mom and they all came up for a fun day of swimming. Mom didn't look good at all today. She looks so swollen especially in her face. Her legs do look better, the edema must be settling down a bit. She just was so mellow not talkative a busy like normal. She just kind of layed around. Her clarity was so-so. She still thinks that Aspen is a boy, its a bit funny with her in all her pink and all.

I do have to make a comment about my cute Hunter. He has been night and day different since those tonsills of his came out. His voice has changed both Justin and I have noticed that. But his attitude and helpfulness have just goine through the roof. He has always been helpful but now he is amazing. In the morning he will get up get Ridge a bottle out of the cupboard, fill it with milk, warm it in the microwave, get Ridge out of the crib (which is no easy task) bring him and the bottle into my room and put him in bed with me. All without being asked. He has offered to help me more than normal and has been so darling with his brother and sister. He told me yesterday "I could just eat Ridge's chubby little cheeks" Where does he get this stuff? He is sleeping in the morning till 8:30 and sometimes 9. And for those of you who know Hunter he is my early riser. I think his tonsils must have caused him alot of discomfort!

The Kids

My Mom

So here is the latest on my mom. Let me give everyone a quick recap on the past several months. In August of last year she was diagnosed with metastasized cancer. It was actually found in her pelvis on an x-ray. Being metastasized means it has spread to her bones but did not start there. After having mammograms, blood work and a CT scan her Oncologist believed (let me say that again BELIEVED) it has come from her breast. (She has lumps all over her one breast that have been there for quite sometime come to find out but the one person who saw her on a regular occasion never thought to send her in for a mammogram, we believe she hasn't had one in many, many years) In order to give a definite diagnosis she would need to have a biopsy of her breast which would be done in a doctors office and be minimally invasive and cost around $400. The oncologist said there was some evidence that it may have come from her colon. Well that person decided it was in my moms best interest to not have a biopsy because they weren't going to treat it regardless and why spend the money (Us kids have offered on many occasions to pay for it but have been told NO). "She was terminal". Now in all fairness me and Jen and James have always known that my mom if diagnosed with a terminal illness would choose not to have extraordinary measures to fight it. The problem we feel is that we do not know what she has and how far it has progressed. From all of the research us kids have done once the cancer has spread to the bones you are given no more than 6 months to live. Well that was almost 1 year ago. In that time my mom has not been to a doctors office since that meeting with the Oncologist (do I sound bitter). She has been taken home and is waiting to die. It is very sad to watch.

The other issue for her is her Alzheimer's. She has a fraction of the mind that she used to. Some days she can comprehend who we all are, what year it is, who the grandkids are etc. Because of her depleting mental state she really isn't able to make any medical decisions for herself. She is a handful to care for I know this. Her husband works 3 days a week and does have 2 college girls living with him helping care for her during the day. Hospice is coming in (an aid see's her a couple of times a week and helps her bathe and do her hair, she also sits and talks to her and many of you know how much she likes to talk.) I don't believe an actual doctor from hospice has been in to see her at all and I know a nurse comes on occasion. She is on ALOT of drugs. Anti psychotic, sleeping meds, anxiety meds, morphine and much more. So we think what little mind is left is greatly altered by them. I do think she needs them, without it she is running around a million miles and hour and having a bit of psychosis.

Physically she looks so thin, maybe 100 pounds, she has edema in her legs (that means they are very swollen and full of fluid) and walks hunched over. Remarkably she looks pretty good for someone who is dying. She still has a fun witty personality even if she is confused about what she is talking about.

I talk to her several times a week lately. She calls me sometimes 5 times a day and can't remember she called me 10 minutes before. She does the same with Jen. I try to see her weekly. I know us kids are openly criticized about how little we visit but we try hard. One of us is there once a week and we talk to her on the phone frequently. Jen has had her at her home a couple of times for several days but Jen has her hands full with her own kids, daycare and trying to get her realtor license. James is living in Provo, finishing school, working and does the best he can. I try once a week to see her and would like to have her at my home more but she literally runs around and is harder to watch than Ridge. I have alot of guilt about not being able to do more for her (I only live 15 minutes from her). Most kids in there 20's don't having dying parents. I try to raise my family, work, hold a very busy church calling, and so much more.

This week I was going to bring her up to watch Hunter's baseball game but the game was cancelled so I picked her up and we went to Brigham City to the fruit stands, well they are closed. So we went to Leatherby's (who new Brigham City had a leatherby's and we went to Maddox and got take out for her to take home for dinner and went on a drive. After about 2 hours my kids were sick of being in the car so that was it.

If anyone has any grand advice on my mom I am open to hear it.

All About Ridge

Ridge is the most enjoyable and purely delightful child. He hasn't always been that way. But Justin and I commented when he was about 16 months how easy he was getting. There are a few things that Ridge truely loves. At the very top of that list is his blue blanket. Many of you know that he can't sleep or ride in a car with out it. He has become so attached to his "Bankee". With the blanket comes the thumb. We may regret later that he has become so attached to it but I don't see anything wrong with it and he only sucks it when he has the blanket.

The next love Ridge has is food. Now I know that is hard to believe because he is so skinny and all. He is getting pickier as he gets older but there still is alot that he likes. He loves Oreo cookies but the little stinker opens them up eats the cream filling and throws the cookie part on the ground. He loves his bottles of warm milk which he has 3 -4 times a day. He enjoys sweet potato pancakes, moms roast, potatos and gravy, brownies (he gets that from mom), yogurt raisins and much more.

Ridges greatest love is for people. He has so much personality and with that is a love for everyone. There are a few that he worships. His dad is at the top of his list. The kid is amazing he can hear the garage door open and he comes running "dada". He would follow his dad anywhere. He rides on the riding lawn mower with his car seat strapped on the front just to be with his dad. He loves his grandpas. "Panka" (my dad) makes his eyes light up. He will just sit in his arms content as can be (but its even better when panka has some sort of sweet treat he is sharing with him). He also love Grandpa Naeg (Justin's step-dad) and loves to play with him and his dog. Another love of Ridge's is for a good friend of ours Trisha. If she comes over to our home or he sees her at church her runs to her and just throws his arms around her. When she trys to leave he just sobs like he has lost his best friend. I think it is his 1st crush.

Hunter's Surgery

Hunter had his tonsils and adenoids removed on Wednesday. For those of you who aren't aware, Hunter has had throat problems since he was just a small child. With over 6 strep throats by the age of 2 the doctor actually wanted to remove them at that time. We opted to wait for one more case of strep and then we would go ahead. Well we went one year without and episode. Every doctor that as ever looked in his throat has commented at vast size of his tonsils. Things have gone down hill since he turned 5, with 3 cases of strep since then. He was has always snored and was starting with sleep apnea. He had marble size lumps on top of his tonsils. So the time had some!

When the nurse called us back to the recovery room after his surgery there he was wide eyed and melancholy looking right at us. Unlike all the other children his age who were crying and moaning, Hunter was the picture of the perfect patient. He has dealt with the surgery in stellar Hunter fashion. The doctor told us to keep him down for 10 days with no running, jumping, sports, etc. Within 1 hour of getting home from the hospital he was running from one room of the house to another.

We have only had a few meltdowns and pain complaints but he has done remarkably well and is itching to get back on the tramp and baseball field.